Melhia42
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I am a bit too much for most, I feel everything, i love all, my expectations of myself are just ridiculously high and of others i just always poke, suggest, hel...
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I am a bit too much for most, I feel everything, i love all, my expectations of myself are just ridiculously high and of others i just always poke, suggest, help, offer, give. I am newly sober a bit over one year and I found out that I have no idea who the hell I am, what I should be doing or why the fuck at 37 am I living with my mom, and my 9 year old neise. Needless my mom is not doing well. I want to scream to the top of the hills, that song creep by stp is exactly right now how I feel, besides stuck. So my point is I drive and I get lost and then when I've cried, sang and can bare another day I drive home. In my opinion this road, the road of what appears cool, fun, the junkie road. I can say most should avoid with everything in them. This road will chew you up and spit out everything you fucked off, all the broken promises, all the lies, the would a should a could a, yeah this road is a bullshit road. And even when you I mean if you pull out of it, it's a dig to get it all back.. peoples trust, love, items, clothes, shoes, even food. I am just saying if I can tell anyone about my path I chose I would say this. The cool guy that you have to fit in with is gonna go bald, rob you, beat you, steal your shit. Then leave you there while you have not one more once of energy in you, but come back to kick ya down more. The cool girls they all loose there teeth, bobs all saggy cause the fluctuating weight. There hair all thin and brittle, skin is so gobbled with makeup its like a statue was put on this body for a head. The cool car you owned if not stolen from you tore the hell up. Your home gone, your possessions gone. Sometimes heaven forbid your mind gone, never to come back. This dark path is full of false promises and lies. In the end if you make it and can muster up the brain waves and activity and see reality the light, good for you. But there's no love or life in that path. So be you, be proud, be courageous and for Gods sake LIVE YOUR LIFE.
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